Tinder: Would you prefer tulips or roses?

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Tinder is easily the best and worst thing to happen this century (okay, one of). For those who don’t know, Tinder is a social media app that allows people to connect with potential love interests by swiping them either into the yes pile or the no pile. If you both swipe yes on each other, voila! It’s a Tinder match!

Many moons ago, I had recently broken up with someone and was lying in bed feeling half relieved and half anxious. I was playing Frozen on my phone when he texted me (this wasn’t long after our break up). It simply said “You’re on Tinder??” to which I replied “… Ah, no.” I was most definitely not on Tinder. I downloaded the app, searched for myself and BAM! There I was, smiling back at me. Somewhat horrified, I emailed Tinder and promptly told them that I had not created that account and for them to please delete me. If only that was the end of it, oy vey. He decided that he was incredibly hurt that I could move on so quickly and that I would choose to do so on Tinder.

UM HELLO, YOU FOUND ME ON TINDER. What are YOU doing on Tinder?! He was all ass and no class.

After that brief ordeal, that was my only experience with Tinder… until recently. A friend of mine broke up with her boyfriend recently and decided that Tinder was going to be her new stomping ground. Being the supportive friend I am, I was like “Sure! We love Tinder! So much love on Tinder!” (Sometimes I wonder why people still want to be friends with me). She went on a couple of dates, both of whom turned out to be complete duds. The first one was playing games so hard I’m surprised they let him graduate primary school. The other one was heaps suave online, and heaps not in real person. He had also fudged some serious details (okay that was heaps pun-ny because he was a baker. Get it? Fudge?! And yes, I wanted her to ask if he gets baked a lot.)

This all got me thinking about the real point of Tinder. Everyone knows it is first and foremost a hook up site. But can it be used by people who don’t want to bone on the first date but who also aren’t going around believing they’ll meet Prince Charming? I personally don’t think I’d use Tinder if I was ever to be single again. I prefer to drunkenly approach someone in a pub, have a partially remembered first encounter and end up happily ever after you know? If you are considering Tinder though, please consider what I am about to share with you. These are not a joke. These are actual screenshots of conversations my Tinder-using friend has recently been subject to.

tinder

 

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